Parental Problems

I've got a problem.
i told my dog to stop being a dick cause he was licking me while i was trying to do the dishes and my mom totally freaked out.
she started yelling at me about how im "not proud of being in this family" (For those of you who read this... i have a confession. Gold is not my real last name. its dick... and i hate it. can you blame me for changing it?!)
and she said stuff like its a great christian family thats been Christians for generations and generations and all this crap and i was like "Growing up in a Christian family isnt that easy for the kid, though." and what i meant by that was that kids who grow up with everyone around them christians, often have a much harder time dealing with faith and stuff. my mom COMPLETELY miss understood me and freaked out! she started yelling about how that was a slam in her face for "taking me in" and "Raising me as her own child" and adopting me and all that other crap. and i just stood there like "I cannot believe this is happening again." she did this over the phone this morning, too. she yelled at me and literally mocked the way i was talking because she thought i was trying to "Sound/talk like Kaija" which i wasnt, i was just tired cause i had just woken up. it was SO mean.
and now this whole thing about bringing up how she took me in and missed out on her life because she had to take care of me and (oh god i wanna swear so bad but i know someone i know will read this if i do... its bad karma)
Im just sick and tired of her doing this to me! she constantly talks openly about how im not a chrisitan because of the way i act/talk/think (she literally thinks she knows what im thinking 24-7) and because of the people and things i like. when the truth is i just dont know how to get a hold of my faith correctly... and if she would stop trying to find ways that i am inadequate compared to her and The Dicks, she might be able to see that.
but the truth is she CANNOT see my thoughts, she DOES NOT know what i am thinking, and she NEVER will.
this whole thing is making me depressed because lately i've been really REALLY wanting a picture of my birth father. i mean, i have NO clue what he looks like, what his job is, if he has anymore kids, if they look like me, where he lives, i wanna know him!
and its not fair that she's keeping information about him from me. she thinks that i hate her, and i dont. im just naturally curious to know about my biological father, i mean, wouldnt you wanna know? its not fair that she's keeping from me what i have a right to know.
im just so sick of her right now i could puke.
i love my mom, i want to get along with her SO badly, but she just will not stop making these outrageous comments about me, so it makes it impossible for us to even try to get along.
God help me because im completely lost.
I need coffee.